Tom Holland the bouncer

This weekend, our twins had their very first house party. Being 14 – we discussed alcohol limits. Both twins made their case for what quantities they thought should be allowed – a couple of bottles each, maybe three. And then we all finally agreed on a level of zero. It’s good being a dad.

Mrs H got some nibbles together – I got the food in and we both promised to keep out of their way. But what about security? What if word got out and undesirables rushed our house?

Step forward their big brother. Only 17 but already bigger than me and for some reason, Tom has much more credibility with teenage boys and particularly girls than I do. No doubt some of the girls even asked to be searched…

Anyway – the party was a success I think. In so far as, there were no tears. No vomiting. Probably some snogging and the odd grope – but definitely no conceptions. No fights and our house is now worth no less than it was before they arrived – which is actually too much because how are kids today going to afford houses?

Not a problem for my eldest but they can’t all be…



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