Celebrity golf days can be awkward affairs especially for the average golfer of dubious celebrity stock – and so it was yesterday at the salubrious Brocket Hall for a day in aid for Help for Heroes.
To be fair the supply of celebrities was rather on the thin side and why I had received a late call up – with David Seaman taking the honours as most recognisable face, with John Salako, Kris Akabusi and Andy Goode in joint second place.
But there was no Tarbie or Brucie.
Celebrities are allocated to teams of paying players – and no doubt teams speculate on which celeb they might get, hoping for Glenn Hoddle or Kevin Keagan – and it is reasonable to assume that Dominic Holland is not on too many wish lists.
And anticipating this, I counter it on the first tee by explaining that the size of celebrity is commensurate the teams wealth and how much they might contribute to the charity – and they’ve got me means that only have themselves to blame.
This gets a laugh and we get all get along very well.
Our team golf was poor but at least we didn’t suffer the ignominy of finishing last – although any such relief at this was put in to perspective when it was explained that the final placed four ball had only five give legs between them – a timely reminder of the reason for the day and that my level of fame is completely unimportant.
Up to a point however, because ahead of dinner, a chap took a seat next to me. We shook hands and introduced each other. He was Del and I was Dom.
‘So which celebrity did you get to play with then…’
